Eight years of seeking a connection with God had me imagining it would be soft and gentle journey…
But the reality is, it’s a whirlwind!
It a force that’s reshaping everything I thought I knew. I can’t keep up with myself and who I am becoming and sometimes I don’t recognise myself. The self I was so familiar with is like an old friend and yet I am not sure of the full version of the NEW self I am becoming.
It’s intense.
Exciting.
And scary!
As I said to my friend the other day, I only previously really had the capacity to imagine a God-lite version of a relationship with God, but what I am experiencing is a God-intense version!
This is wonderful and scary in equal measure.
Old parts of me that are not of me, or for me, are falling away as I step into the next version of my TRUE self, without some of the ‘baggage’ of the old self.
Just a few weeks ago, when I would envision the future, I could see what lay along the path. Now, the future stretches before me like a blinding white light, a vast unknown I can only feel, not see.
Yesterday I told God that I felt scared.
He replied, ‘Why are you afraid? This is what you asked for’.
So true! I HAD been asking for a relationship with him. A closeness. A connection. To hear his voice. To experience his influence in my life.
And it’s far greater than I could ever have imagined.
What I know right now is that it doesn’t matter who I have been, it only matters who I am becoming and that I keep walking in faith to fulfil my purpose.
Karen ❤️
